My problem..

I know that i love my current BF, but why do i still care about my past??? There's seriously something wrong with me... Is this normal? I don't know...I am not sure about other girls out there but i really hate this feeling...It SUCKS~


I am pretty much certain that i have no feelings whatsoever for him anymore but why do i still try keep track of how he's doing?? i tend to check his Facebook status once in a while, ask his friends about him and i even feel satisfied driving past places he usually lingers at and i never see him at all...BUT i dun hope to bump into him someday too(so crazy right? yea~ i noe...)


This guy i am referring to is my most loved one among the previous BFs...and also the one who hurt me most.Everyone wishes for a term of relationship that he/she would both cherish and later on blossom beautifully but among 10 couples how many can make it??? Not many i guess...


He has been a super possessive Bf in the 3 years we were togeda. He never lets me wear shirts with a big collar, or tight-fitting tees when going out with friends. Not to mention miniskirts; those are definitely out of the topic..But overall, i know that he does all that to protect me, to prevent me from shaming in front of other guys...I understand that we were both in a long distance relationship and many ppl say that this would never work out well but I had been a good and obedient Gf then, i trusted him with all my heart and i always tried my best to make him happy. He has his good points and i really adore him for those. 


In 3 years, we quarreled and fought a lot, via phone and sms', fought over small matters and even things that came out from my mouth could make him mad at me. All my friends did not like him, saying that he is too possessive and arrogant. I din mind, and i still stayed togeda with him. Long-distance so wat? I prove to you guys we can make it la~~~There's a saying, 男人不坏女人不爱....haha, is this true? He's not exactly‘坏’to me..but jus strict..It's jus for my own good. He controlled my attire, my actions and controlled the way i throw words out of my mouth jus to make me into a better person. I understand his tantrum to me sometimes; thats because we're so far from each other..Which loving couple would not worry about the other half? He always alwaysss is the one who make up for every argument, bad or worst...TQ for that...I am a overbearing brat i know....sorry okay?


When we broke up, because of some major reasons, I was really sad, super sad u could say...My friends in class said i deserved it for not listening to their advise. That time i could not help but jus cry even louder.  And it's the first and the last time im gonna cry in school. I used to be so tough and loud and strong in school. But y make myself so weak because of a guy??? I wont mention the suicide part here because thats double humiliating. 
I learnt my lesson, never do stupid actions for a guy..It's not worth it.. You will only make them feel proud and boast to others.. We should always cherish our lives and our health for the sake of ourselves.


He is a good guy, really..In love, nobody is right nor wrong. It's jus the time thats not right and we are not fated to be togeda. We might not be friends anymore but i will never forget him and the memories we ever had...Recently, i heard him falling for another girl...And it's not the playful flirty type..He is very picky when it comes to finding GFs, and im sure he's made his choice and this is the right girl for him.


Now, I have my own perfect and too-good-to-be-true BF oredi and i sincerely hope that they too are blissful and happy together, Good luck C-man~

The worst GF of all..

I am quite spoilt by my parents since i was born, not that they won't let me do any housework but it's my laziness that made me restrain from doing anything at home. Being the good and loving parents, they never force me to do anything i don't want...But now, i haf a BF, so i have to learn to do some things girls should. I have to meet his expectations of a good wife in the future and i cant stay under the same roof with my parents pampering me for life rite??? So i have to get out of the bad habit i have now... i have to start TRAINING MYSELF into a semi-kakak (-.-) 


ARGHHH~~~
So please PLEASE let me rant here okay???


I hate housework....
I hate chores....
I hate cleaning, doing the laundry, sweeping and mopping the floors...
HATE HATE  SUPER HATE~


But, the thing is....MY BF IS A CLEANLINESS FREAK!!! 


Every speck of dust at his house can never escape his eyes...so, being the lazy bones gf, i haf to feel guilty every single time i see him sweep, vacuum and clean alone~ I feel bad when i see him doing everything when i am the one dirtying his place all the time.


He loves me too much to ask me to sweep and clean with him, so he gives me these oh-so-fake excuse: 

"i love doing housework, it's a form of exercising my body and a way to stay healthy...See how i maintain my fit body these years?"

OR

"You can't clean well! See the wall edges? Not yet very clean leh~You dunno how to handle the mop properly...I'll do it, please sit down ok? You watch and learn first lah~"

So sad lo.....say i dunno how to clean...at least i tried okay...


But now, he's outstation for work...so i have to do a bit of cleaning around for him..So tat he can come home to a comfy and clean atmosphere...(though my cleaning is still not up to his standard>.<)In that way, he will have more time for me instead of accompanying the broom and mop for 2 hours right upon his return...


YAY~...17 hours, 15 minutes and 24 secs before i can see him again~ can't wait!!


P/s: Blackiee says that he misses you and will starve himself until the minute he meets you...so faster come back la!!!

Don't worry dear, mummy's here for you...

My blog has to start with you of course...

Last night a friend asked, gimme 3 good reasons why you love your BF...to say the truth, i really dun know... I gave many shitty reasons there and then...but none seemed convincing enough...


J said: 你们很快就会分手。。
I said: 为什么这样说？？？
J replied: 因为你还小，你不知道自己到底要什么。。。
......and there he goes on blabbering about his past and his experiences.....telling me at last to make a better choice. I love my boyfriend, i dun haf to explain to you why, sometimes words are just hard to express those deep down feelings i haf for X...


Previously, i had a few girlfriends asking me why do i love and care about X that much....
"Hey, it's not like he's the last man on earth...U're still young(AGAIN) and when u turn 23 or older, ur thinking will be different..Your needs and wants will be different from now. In the future, you shall see..."

Fine, o great prophet, I thank you for your great prediction~

However, I believe that if he's meant to be mine, he will be no matter what happens...I am very contented just being with him. He is my BF, so im sure im most certain of my feelings to him compared to others...


It's our 2nd year together...Unlike other previous BFsss, my love for him(X) is still accelerating like crazy...Just like how i still love MCD's burgers and fries though i've been eating 'em since young....

Love is really powerful huh? It just feels great to have him...Doesn't matter what he is doing, I jus feel comfortable with him somewhere near me...This is the happiest relationship in my life and i hope this is everlasting...I am not going to annouce too much of my undying love to him here but i shall keep every little bits and pieces in a small hard disk in my heart forever~


X, i love you and i always will.....Hope you will appreiciate it...and I think you will...*winkss*